IS PC a primary concern

[Tracy]

Do you expect your users to "play PC" when they are on your site?
Are "lively" debates smothered because you are worried that a user may offend another by calling something "crap"?
Is there a requirement to walk on eggshells?
Heated debate can be good.... there IS a point where name-calling should be called out (and acted upon), but with many, it's gone to the extreme.
I'm finding (especially with some of the younger generations) they can't seem to handle confrontation and it's really a pity. This even carries over into the work environment.
Has society gotten to the point that we all need "safe rooms" to escape to?

 

[Shawn Gossman]

I've done a lot of work in security. I'm considering going back into a related field of "surveillance."

I've been in a lot of confrontations in those lines of work. I think it's a great experience, personally. But I find myself having to use "verbal judo" to make a turning bad situation into a better situation.

But many kids these days are super non-confrontational, and when they get into situations where the confrontation is really bad and even physical, it almost seems like they don't know how to defend themselves.

I don't think it's a good thing.

 

[secretprojects]

Do you expect your users to "play PC" when they are on your site?
Are "lively" debates smothered because you are worried that a user may offend another by calling something "crap"?
Is there a requirement to walk on eggshells?
Heated debate can be good.... there IS a point where name-calling should be called out (and acted upon), but with many, it's gone to the extreme.
I'm finding (especially with some of the younger generations) they can't seem to handle confrontation and it's really a pity. This even carries over into the work environment.
Has society gotten to the point that we all need "safe rooms" to escape to?

I have fairly strict rules on behaviour. My site attracts retired aeronautical engineers that are valuable sources of information, and several of these older guys were turned off discussions due to rudeness and course language on the part of some users. Therefore I have fairly strict rules on this -

General Conduct

Remember The Golden Rule: Treat others as you would have them treat you. The internet can allow you to behave in ways you would never do face to face in real life. Bullying online can be as hurtful as in the real world. Patterns of bad behaviour will result in moderation or banning.

ALWAYS be polite and civil in forum posts and private messages.

Personal attacks, insults or the belittling of the opinions of others, will ALWAYS be considered inappropriate. Disagree (tactfully and respectfully) all you like with their ideas or opinions, but don't resort to insults, name-calling or flaming. Argue facts, not personalities. 'Ad hominem' is a logical fallacy and will generally result in disciplinary action.

Swearing and vulgarity is strongly discouraged. The world is a big place, with different cultures and conventions, and what is acceptable to you might be highly offensive to others of different ages and backgrounds. Remind yourself that these are real people with whom you are dealing. They have feelings. Most people are fundamentally decent. Try to treat others with the dignity you expect to recieve from them.

The conversations feature allows users to send private messages to each other. If a user informs you they do not wish to engage in conversation, you must respect their wishes or face disciplinary action.

If other users are not as civil as you would like them to be, be more civil, not less in response, or say nothing, and report the post. Some of our older members in particular are actively turned off from the forum by coarse language and rudeness and some valuable former members have been lost from the forum as a result.

Keep in mind that meaning in written text may be ambiguous. Irony is not always obvious when written. Remember that text comes without facial expressions, vocal inflection, or body language. Be careful choosing the words you write: what you meant to say might not be what others understand. Likewise, be careful how you interpret what you read: what you understand might not be what others mean, especially if English is not their first language.

I personally strongly stand behind the rules for the userbase of my forum. However, this kind of restriction doesn't work for all types of forum.

 

[Tracy]

personally strongly stand behind the rules for the userbase of my forum. However, this kind of restriction doesn't work for all types of forum.

The only problem that I see there... after over 1 1/2 decades in law enforcement, I'm used to being treated at a different level than others... so should adustments be made due to my higher tolerance levels based upon my actual exposure to life, or is it placed at the "I wear my feelings on my sleeve" level?
That is the issue that I'm bringing to the forefront. Some can take a LOT more heat than others, and in all honestly expect others to be able to do similar.
Then you have those that get butt-hurt if the word crap is used in a post/reply to them as to a position that they may have taken.

 

[Tracy]

But many kids these days are super non-confrontational, and when they get into situations where the confrontation is really bad and even physical, it almost seems like they don't know how to defend themselves.

THIS is a major issue that I have with society today. WAY to many of them lack the drive (and usually the ability) to actually defend themselves against others, either by verbal judo or even up to physical force.
It's simply another aspect of the "we need a safe space" belief... many can't realize that actual life is not safe.... there are dangers lurking everywhere, not to mention confrontational aspects that go against their personal belief system. They have been so "trained" to think everyone should follow what they believe, they can't confront alternative opinions, depending on the cry of "your racist/homophobic/whatever the current rant of the day is". It seems that WAY to many of them can't carry on a logical, cognizant debate with others.... instead falling back on the "woe is me" philosophy.